Big Macs Are NOT Making Our Children Fat

I forthwith rain upon your “Let's Move!” parade. Excuse me, but a child's burger meal with a plastic Ninja-Turtle toy is not the cause of morbid obesity or diabetes in our children.

Exhibit A: THE BIG MAC

First, I will require you to download the complete nutrition facts from the Mcdonalds website:

http://www.mcdonalds.com/us/en/food/food_quality/nutrition_choices.html

click on the 'Nutrition Info' to download a PDF that lists all of their food.

Exhibit B: USDA “Nutrition Standards in the National School Lunch and School Breakfast Programs”

Click on http://www.fns.usda.gov/cnd/governance/legislation/USDAFoods.pdf to get the official USDA PDF nutrition document.

Your Homework Assignment

Compare the USDA requirements for fat, sodium, protein, ad nauseum with the nutrition facts from your fav and mine, the Big Mac. You will see that the latter conforms to the former. Yet, Mayor McCheese does not measure up.

Why?

The same reason that Jamie Oliver's whole-wheat, Thai, sesame, noodle-carrot salad fails the test: not enough vegetable. A child's lunch of turkey and cheese on whole wheat bread, a bag of potato chips, banana, and apple juice is rejected as unsuitable, to be replaced by the health-food-Nazis by deep-fried chicken nuggets and huge pile of french fries.

Why?

According to USDA regs that you downloaded and studied, french fries, a fattening starch made from potatoes, count as a healthy vegetable (a Big Mac is 550 calories, add a med french fry, and it rockets up to 900 calories). Notate bene: pizza also counts as a healthy vegetable: http://articles.latimes.com/2011/nov/28/health/la-he-school-lunch-nutrition-20111128

You see, the requirement is for a full cup (¾ to 1) of vegetable, but food processors have distorted this to include pizza and french fries, because there is big profit to be made, but are no more healthy than ordinary junk food. Surely this is a case of crony capitalism. And, no, using sweet potatoes in place of russet potatoes does not make the fries any healthier.

Waddup?

In a nutshell, these are some of the USDA requirements for lunch:

• reduced sodium and trans-fat
• whole grains
• colored veggies and legumes
• non-fat milk vs. whole milk

Certainly, these are excellent nutritional rules for the hyper-tensioned, beer-bellied, overweight, cardio-vascular-impaired old fogeys who pass these regs. However, these are not suitable for children growing an inch or two per year who need hi-density, good quality sources of protein and fat, qua: tuna fish sandwiches, cold chicken, cold cuts, cheese, whole milk, and peanut butter. Kids will simply toss these “healthy veggies” and not eat them (ask any parent who has tried to feed growing teens who will eat almost anything remotely edible).

I Like Pink Slime

Ground beef (hamburger, meatloaf, tacos) is the single most dangerous thing we can feed to our children. You see, a singe patty is an amalgam of literally hundreds of cows. If any one of them is diseased, the whole batch is contaminated and anyone eating even a small portion might become sick and perhaps even die. This is because commercial chopped-up cow is not tested or treated. Pink slime is different: every portion is chemically treated to eliminate all potential disease and sickness. Better, pink slime is made from virtually fat-free meat trimmings. Given a choice, I would prefer to eat pink slime. Perhaps less taste, but virtually fat free, pathogen-free, and way cheap. Who in their right mind would deny such a valuable and affordable source of nutrition to our children? Hmmm? Because Jamie Oliver publicized it in a TV show?

OK, Smarty-Pants, So Why Are the Children Getting Fat?

I do not contest the observation that our kids are becoming very, very fat to the point of endangering their health. But why? On my bus ride to and from work, depending on which bus I take, I pass by a convenience store. At both 8am and 3pm, there is a steady procession of teenagers armed with sodas, cookies, chips, and assorted colored edibles of unknown origin. Somehow, I doubt that our teens are getting fat because they are being serving pizza slices for lunch made from white flour rather than from whole grain.

The Solution

If a major ag company or food processor meets the USDA requirements, they are rewarded with government contracts worth $billions; that is why these national school lunch standards exist, not because it makes our children healthier. Just take the whole USDA nutrition requirements and chuck it into the trash – we simply do not need them. I am sure that the lunch lady and district nutritionists are fully capable of feeding healthy lunches to our children that they will enjoy. The 'Feds' are not being helpful.